A final revelation | too soon, too late

At this point of my education, i've come to realize that i am rather unfit for the purpose of becoming a professional philosopher. i'm aware of a limitation in the quantity (yes quantity) of my thinking patterns in doing analysis. And for what it's worth, the philosophical 'horsepower'. It's probably too young for to draw this conclusion. But somehow i do not foresee myself pursuing this particular kind of mentality milestone. In anycase, i would like to acknowledge the magnitude of creativity in the minds of philosophers. My pastor has acknowledged and hinted to me that philosophers are the smallest circle of elites that has the least to do with our world - to a certain extent. However, any breakthrough will exert itself so tremendously over our reality that it cannot help but to reshape everything. Every culture and century (including the one in which you live in) has more or less proceeded with some degree of major philosophical paradigm shift. Now, whether it has been fitting or good in light of the Christian worldview, that's a wholly different issue. But there is a proper homage due for philosophy, or the lack thereof in our societies.

In the plentiful conversations and discussions that i have had with my prof. over the years, i have come to see how he has challeneged the varying positions that i try to establish from many different angles, perspectives, and well-established traditions, most of which he doesn't believe in or follow for himself. If my interest in such dialogues does not diminish over time (which it probably will), perhaps i should revisit philosophy once again decades later. Strange to see how this blog (and its author) evolve from psychology all the way across through philosophy to pure theology. I think i now know why God brought me here.

But i feel that it's too soon to leave this place. There is still much to learn, and uncover from the lectures of many professors here, some of whom i have hardly met at all save their names and faces. Which is rather unfortunate. And for the first time (in my last semester here) i have taken my religion courses here seriously for my own interest and out of the context of my academic requirement. Oh my what regret do i have... I only wish i had taken more of them sooner (after the wish that education were free) well too late for that now. I wish i could return here one day to take some more courses under several profs here (again, after the wish of a free education), namely in the departments of religion, most definitely music, literature, and perhaps theatrical arts.